I Am Not A Great Teacher

by Shelly Blake-Plock

I am not a great teacher. Many of my former students would probably agree. I'm at times flaky. And I can certainly be absent minded. I tend to ask students to do too much work all at once, probably because that's the way I do things.

I'm a terrible test-prepper. When I do give lectures, I tend to go on tangents. Sometimes I mix up names, dates, events; this happens at family BBQs, too.

I keep my gradebook relatively up-to-date, but tend to prefer talking directly to students about what we've been learning/doing rather than just mark up assignments. This works for some students, it doesn't for others. And thus, I often find myself in the position of doing what I'm "supposed to do" as a teacher when I feel and I know from experience that there is a better way to do things.

When I started teaching, I was absolutely terrible at classroom management. A decade in, I realize that my classroom management issues stopped being issues around year 3 when I stopped trying to control everything going on in my classroom. I don't think any of us really realize what classroom management is all about until years into teaching when we've realized that we haven't thought about classroom management in a while.

I try to talk candidly with parents. And I will argue my point. But I'll also listen to yours. As a father of three elementary school kids, I value conversations with their teachers where they are open and honest with me even if I disagree with what they are saying.

Sometimes I've gotten into trouble because I've been too open or outspoken about things. I know there are many folks on the faculty who don't like me. I've let certain grudges go on too long.

But at the same time, I feel like there are people who get an idea in their head about what you represent, and from there on out, there is no changing their opinion.

Happens in my head, too.

I am not a great teacher. I'm not always prepared. Though I do think I am a pretty good improviser. And I think that is an essential, but over-looked skill. I like the idea that any kid can bring up any point about any subject and within seconds we can be talking about something that could potentially change a life in a way my prepared lesson never could.

I tend to hate most professional development. And yet, I like to design new kinds of PD.

A lot of people confuse me with someone who thinks technology is the answer to all of our problems. Those people are probably people who don't like to read long blog posts.

Fair enough.

I always hated working in groups as a student. But now, I work with groups all the time. In some ways, I couldn't function professionally without my network. That network -- that group ever changing and evolving in thought and substance -- is the circulatory system at the heart of what I think about when I think about education.

I'm not a great teacher. I can't teach you how to be a great teacher. You are probably a better teacher than me. I don't know.

What I do know is that I'm a pretty good learner. I like learning. I'm also a pretty good share-er. I like sharing. When I am learning and sharing, I don't feel like my back is to the wall. I feel comfortable. I feel like my motivations are honest. I feel like I can be myself. And I feel a bit more useful to other folks.

I am far more interested in being a conduit for ideas. A conduit for conversation. A conduit for debate. For real learning. Connecting. Rethinking. Reframing debates. Debates and discussions. The stuff of humanity.

I don't remember off the top of my head what year Napoleon became emperor. I'd have to look it up. I guess that makes me a pretty lousy history teacher.

But I'm willing to not know.

I take a lot of solace in the example of Socrates. Not because I think I'm like Socrates, but because I think deep down Socrates is a lot like all of us. Socrates was a guy who both boastfully and intimately explained that in the end, he really didn't know anything.

And that was enough to change everything.